The wonderings, ponderings and other 'ings' of me. Lifestyle, review, news and opinion posts. Chic with a hint of sarcasm... hopefully!

Tuesday 27 May 2014

Made In Chelsea - is anyone safe from Spencer (or Stevie?!)

White Flower @Cristina Bernhardsen Dreamstime Stock Photos
Let me start by saying I know that the ‘reality’ bit of Made in Chelsea’s stops at the cast’s names and that most of the situations they find themselves in are clearly orchestrated by the crew.  For example, meeting the one person they don’t want to see on a completely deserted London street that just happens to have a camera crew lurking about on it.  However seeing as I still angrily tweet my way through each episode I thought an MIC rant blog was in order.

NB will not be giving that much of a back story, you know what these amoebas have been up to.

Not since The Hills, or indeed my sisters ex-boyfriend, has there been a character I dislike more than Spencer.   Having repeatedly proved that he could not give a tinkers tit about anyone but himself, he has, again, done the dirty on his friends.  Firstly by cajoling Mytton’s (Binky’s Boyf) into taking part in an orgy (sure it was a gun/head scenario!)  but also by picking up a bit of fluff whose name I can’t remember purely because he knew Sam was into her.

This it seems was staggering to Sam which is strange seeing as Spencer went out with his sister Louise for far too many seasons and therefore he must have seen him cheat on her so constantly that she was turned into the personification of ‘damaged goods’. Said bit of fluff is only 19 and I don’t hold out much hope that her blank look will be a permanent feature, but does go to show that Spencer may have finally run out of fully grown adults to chase after.

It is surprising, considering the assumed IQ and sheer number of his conquests that a pregnancy scare hasn’t come up yet.  Perhaps it’s planned for the series finale or maybe Spencer has the entire female population of London sprayed down with a spermicide before they leave their abodes on the off chance he fancies bumping uglies with one/some of them.

At the bridge (where everyone goes for a good old bawl) Myttons and Binky have a rehash of his infidelity. NB Myttons, saying ‘fuckin’ every other word does not make your declaration of love any more believable.  What would is going 10 minutes without sticking your penis into other girls, 5 at least at last count, and then lying about it.  

In the final scene of the episode at a laughable ‘picnic’ Sam gleefully advises Riley that Stevie has kissed Stephanie. Up until now Stevie has acted like much less of an arsehole than most of the others, it seems the director’s probable promise of more cash per episode if he gets embroiled in A.N. Other love triangle was too good to pass up.

Stephanie Pratt (sister of aforementioned The Hills Spencer and kisser of Stevie) has some wicked one liners, in response to Stevie’s comment “I never wear green” she sarcastically replied “you’re so brave!” However it’s Lucy that remains the main saving grace of the show who acts like a normal person when faced with the rampant exchange of fluids between this frighteningly small group of bipeds, and even she’s fallen once or twice. 

Which is why the trailer from next week is so confusing as it sees Binky having dinner with Spencer and arguing with Lucy!  I don't know what's worse, that they are SUCH a bunch of numpties, or that I can't help but watch it every Monday.

I have decided though that this Chelsea is not a place in the known Universe, but a parallel one in which foolish, impractical and downright insane behaviour reigns.  And this is BAFTA award winning TV by the way.  *Palm Slaps Face*


PS if you're wondering about the flower image, I figured that a few of you may be as enraged as I was with the above, so thought a tranquil image might cancel some of this out... oh and it was free thanks to Dreamstime Stock photos.
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Monday 26 May 2014

S.O.T.W.

So I have www.vintagesoph.blogspot.co.uk to thank for this post. Song of the Week is a beautiful new idea for me, which is kinda strange seeing as I fuckin' love music. 

There's a special kind of natural high that comes with discovering a tune which hits you in the chest, gut and heart all at the same time.  A truly inspiring song can change our appearance, hairs on arms stand up, we smile and are moved to dance.  Then there's that other magic that happens when you hear some lyrics that seem to have been fished out from inside your head and speaks your thoughts and feelings so clearly.  That satisfying moment that says "yeah, you understand me" Only music can do that! 

I'm constantly downloading random songs I've heard on adverts or shows I watch and get quite obsessed about them, in the short term at least, playing them on a loop for days.  The problem is that I  am definitely not monogamous with my song love. I get hooked on so many and am always on the look out for a new favourite tune.  There are at least 3 recently that have really hit home so I'll include all in this post and let you work out which ones you like (or not) yourself.

The Hawk In Paris - Freaks
This one I got from an episode of The Originals and speaks to those of us that feel a little off shall we say?  Those that don't quite fit in and aren't conforming to societies ideas of 'normal'.  Its very comforting to here the lead singer, Dan Haseltine's voice all sensual and welcoming stating "we know the halls you walk are unforgiving".  Whether those halls are at school, uni or work it doesn't matter, it's all inclusive, beckoning you to come along with them, not that you need much encouragement.  Dan (cos we are on first name terms now you understand) is also a good christian boy, not the preachy, you're all doing things wrong' type but the genuinely interested in making the world a better place type, which can't be bad. 


Lissie - Cold Fish
This singer songwriter from the south is one smart cookie.  With butter coloured blonde hair and a freckled face look, she sings with a husky sound that may, or may not, have come from drinking the tequila she seemed to be loving at the last gig of hers I saw,  I discovered Lissie by accident (but isn't that always the best way?) as she supported Dallas Green a few years back, she then turned up at just about every festival and venue available, this girl and her band work hard!  Cold Fish is a revenge type song.  Sing it at the top of your voice in your room at someone who thinks they know better than you, who thinks they've got you sussed but in reality is more lost than anyone.  It's very rewarding.

Nick Mulvey - Meet Me There
Finally there's this cheeky chappie.  In truth I''ve only heard one of his songs but on the strength of that song have booked tickets to see him in my home town of Cambridge, cos that's where he's from too.  Am not sure why but the fact that he is from where I now live has me feeling rather proud, like I had some hand in raising him. Daft that innit?

Anyway, I downloaded Meet Me There a couple of weeks ago and it's been on constant rotation on my phone ever since.  It's a happy summer song with a carefree vibe that goes perfectly with cycling through a field of sunflowers.  Please Note: am not actually suggesting you do this, the dream scenario of cycling through sunflowers is way more romantic than the actuality of it. There'll be no pathway, you'll hobble over stones and rocks, fighting off bees or other insects and most likely end up getting smacked in the face with a sunflower stalk (the rocky balboa of flower stems).

So there you have it, my Songs of the Week.  Do tell me yours -  I feel that new song itch just waiting to be scratched.

All pictures taken of posters with my phone - thanks


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Tuesday 20 May 2014

Food review: Eat Drink and be Buggied!


Last weekend was the Eat Cambridge Festival day and while there have been pop up restaurants and debates going on since 10th May, Saturday was the main event, the market day.  This is when all and sundry queue to get into the Corn Exchange to find out what's new in food.

Unfortunately the connecting shires all got the same memo about the second ever Eat Cambridge event and headed on over at precisely the same time we did.
12.30.
On a sunny Saturday afternoon.
Dead in the town centre.
Can't think why it was so busy!

We queued to get into a hall way too small for the number of it's inhabitants and as such meant we were treated to a shuffle-stop-shuffle-stop pace.   I haven't seen such a crowd since I decided it would be a good idea to go to Selfridges on 23rd December (the man was NOT happy!)

That said once we got to see what was available the stands were pretty demon and all had freebie food stuffs (except the tea, but who wants to eat 'raw' tea?).  Silver Oak Coffee had an array of sexy smelling beans, all ground locally and the beans are direct trade.  This means SOC get their beans from smaller distributors to ensure a fair wage, the Brazilian Fazenda Crueiro pack that we bought has been stinking out the kitchen (in a good way) since the weekend, I can't wait to try it.

Lots of sustainable and local or home made produce were used in the making and baking of brownies, breads, cakes and sweets.  I managed to sample a stupidly hot chili by accident.  "They start cool and go up in heat from left to right" the stall owner advised.  Right'O I thought, ever backwards with my directions dived into the sauce at the end of the table.  The wrong end as it turned out, I may as well have swallowed molten lava.

Jacks Gelato was on hand, but the queue was so long, we ended up leaving what was a lovely looking and very interesting food fair to go and get some lunch in town!

Had it been in a different venue I'd have concluded it to be a roaring success, most people would probably say it was anyway.  I say only if you don't mind having your toes sliced off by a yummy mummy and her buggy, is it wrong to suggest designated time zones for the buggy brigade?
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Sunday 11 May 2014

100th Post - Today's Wish List

So this is my 100th post, not sure how I feel about reaching my centenary but wanted to thank everyone that has stopped by, be it once or a bunch of times for checking me out. 

Today's post is a general wish list of things I yearned for this weekend but for couldn't really afford. Mainly cos last week I treated myself to a certain skull covered hot pink scarf so no need to feel sorry for me!  Wish list posts are one step further than window shopping, as I have pictures of the things I want and therefore in a 2 dimensional way I already own them, right?

Boudoir Femme
I'm lucky enough to live of a beautiful city with a good selection of independent and high street shops and often find myself wandering into this boutique as the clothes here always seem to be unique.  They are on the cha-ching side but for a little treat they do stock the cutest and reasonably priced jewellery line called Hultquist.  I swear I would love any of their bracelets (NB dear husband in case you're reading this :) The staff are generally lovely as well, always ready for a quick chat or to let you browse in peace if that's your poison.

Karen Millen
A brand which I used to love but then went a little (dare I say it 'the fairs in town'). Cheap materials and gaudy designs turned me off, but today I stopped in and found these little gems.
I'm not sure what, if anything has changed at head office, but as cute summer dress designs go KM are back in my good books.  The material felt so much smoother and a decent quality as well, like an LK Bennett or Reiss dress, only a tad cheaper.  Which is no bad thing, both those high end high street stores, though lovely, could do with a bit of healthy competition!
The shoes are lovely too and (praise be!) they seem to have started doing 1/2 sizes. Let all the odd footed of us rejoice!
Paper Chase
I've had a stationary habit (some would say affliction) for quite some time now and love a browse around this shop.  It's here I saw a postcard stand all cheerful and cheap and at risk of giving my age away I found myself wondering why don't we write to people anymore? I'm not talking getting your quill and ink out, just little 'thinking of you' card to a friend or someone you haven't chatted to in a while.  I may start a one woman protest to get the humble postcard back in circulation.
The White Company
Another of my 'afflecitions' is candles, living with a man means there are times when a decent candle is essential! While some do smell like old lady wee, these two were fresh and fragrant without being overpowering. Yummy.
Market
We also have a killer Saturday market, great for food stuffs, picnic and nicknack's! today I found this cheese (another thing I'm addicted to, I had no idea there were so many!) from The Cheese and Pie Man.  This one was 4 yrs old, really creamy and the best bit is it comes in a comedy cartoon bomb shape.  The pies looked pretty good too!
The Tailors Cat
Finally, I walked past the best Wedding dress shop in town (it's where I got mine from) and found this gorgeous thing in the window.  The dresses and the owner are both some of the loveliest I have encountered.  I wonder if my husband would marry me again so I can wear this one?
I can but dream...


Photos are all my own, please credit me if you choice to 'borrow' any of them, thanking you!
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Wednesday 7 May 2014

Met Ball Judgement

The Met Ball Gala, an event that seems to be an excuse for 0.4% richest bods on the planet to pop on a posh frock (cos the poor dears NEVER get a chance to do that now do they?) but to give this carpet some depth it has a theme! (oooooh).  This is set by some faceless museum dudes and dudettes who are wheeled out once a year to exert what small power they have over celebs and their dress sense, looking at some of these I reckon it's just to give them a good giggle.  It also gives us a chance to be a little judgey of their stylists selection (unless Blake Lively is there, rumour has it she dresses herself.) 

Oh and just in case they didn’t have a good enough time swanning around in designer gowns and priceless gems, there are after parties to attend as well.  Bitter, me? Best we just get on with this yes…

Emma Stone – Thakoon
An odd one this. So cool is Stone I'm betting she had that hair done and top on all day and spent so much time being generally lovely that she didn’t leave enough to get changed.  Just swapped her jeans for a skirt and ta-daaa! Met Ball ready! Not the most attention seeking outfit but she’s not that kinda girl now is she?  Could totally hang with this one though I reckon I’d dork out in a millisecond and have to slink away after saying something mortifying like "Did you wear that on purpose"?


Lupita Nyong’o bespoke Prada
Another strange one here (who put acid in the stylists tea this year?) but I kinda like this anyway. Luppie isn’t afraid of taking a chance and at least she’s covered that manly chest of hers this time.

Anne Hathaway Calvin Klein
I used to love this girl but her Oscars Prada horror has me rethinking her style status. Does this make anyone else think she looks a little stumpy?  Not a fan.

Rhianna Stella McCartney
So you can do classy as well as hooker-y?  Loved this and as a self-confessed hater of McCartney designs and not the biggest fan of RiRi’s style it’s an unusual double thumbs up for me!  Loving the hand tat(too) but hope it’s a wash off.  PS just saw an image of this from the back and like it even more now.

Kristen Stewart Chanel,
Oooh so close! If you ripped off the netting under the feathered section this would have been killer, are we sure Karl designed this? If so it was made for someone (anyone!) else as it’s not doing much for KS.  Hair’s a nice colour though.
Kate Upton Dolce & Gabbana
This is supposed to remind us of My Fair Lady yes?
What’s the theme again this year?
Right it's ‘Charles James: Beyond Fashion’is it?
No wonder they’re all so confused!

Reese Witherspoon  Stella McCartney
Woah! what the fuck is up with that look on her face?  Seems Reese didn’t want to attend so sent a high class sex doll in her place, totally dead behind the eyes! Love the pink but I am telling you those pointy boob bits would have been a ma-hoo-sive pain in the behind by the end of the night.  Unless you're a dead behind the eyes sex doll in which case you probably didn't feel a thing.
Shailene Woodley Rodarte
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!  What the? Honey, who did this to you? Seriously, Sack. Your. Stylist!  Why WHY would you put a cute young thing like Shailene in a carpeted 70’s fancy dress outfit?  No no no no no. You are SO heading to the Fashion Police worst dressed list (or was that your plan all along?)

Georgia May Jagger Mugler by David Koma dress
With her mouth shut this girl is a knock out, though I do love that she refuses to get her gap filled in. Time to state the obvious: Jerry Hall as a mum pays dividends! and this dress is hotly rivalled as Best Dressed

Katie Holmes Marchesa
Ok I get it now, they ARE emulating old Hollywood’s worst fashion in films, Scarlett O’Hara herself couldn’t have made a better dress out of her curtains than Katie did with these.  That pay out from Tom didn’t go far did it? Another worst dressed contender.
Hailee Steinfeld Prabal Gurung
So THIS is how you smuggle a muggle into the Met ball! For such a pretty girl it’s a bit much but she's allowed to get it wrong on occasion on account of her being all young and youthful and full of … youngness.
Joan Smalls Vera Wang
LOVE this. Even the lipstick, especially with the lipstick actually as without it the whole look would have been nice but safe.  Another almost best dressed.

Lily Allen Chanel Couture
Someone needs to check Karl's Meds….

Blake Lively - Gucci Première
Ms Lively WAS there and as predicted kicked the arse off of every celeb there (yes even you Beyoncé).   She wins best dressed due to the cape/back section (love it!) AND the boobs, what a defying-ly beautiful creature she is.  Plus she has the yummiest accessory, note to self: stop dribbling on keyboard.



Who was your best and worst?
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Sunday 4 May 2014

Where Its At...

"You know that thing when you see someone cute and he smiles and your heart kind of goes like warm butter sliding down hot toast? Well that's what it's like when I see a store. Only it's better". When I first saw Confessions of a Shopaholic and heard these immortal words I knew, just KNEW that the store Kinsella had in mind was Selfridges in London, or as I call it The Mother Ship.
Browsing Beauty
There are other department stores, and other Selfridges for that matter, but for me the one on Oxford Street is the pinnacle of the ideal shopping experience.  I've harped on about it in a myriad of tweets and status' - is it status' statuses or stati? I've no clue, feel free to add the right one yourself - to anyone with half an ear, so I figured it was about time I backed up my claim. So for you, dear reader, here are my Top Five Reasons Why Oxford Street Selfridges Kicks the Arse of any Other Store in the World.
Even the Mannequins are chic (and relaxed!)
1. Architecture
The building is a beautiful and brilliant reminder of what we mere humans can do if appropriately gifted.  It's got The Queen of Time riding a huge bloody ship at the front door for goodness sakes.  What more could you want?

2. Service
Mr Selfridge himself is credited by some as coming up with the phrase 'the customer is always right'.  Whether its true or not when it comes to customer service, he certainly wanted us to have a better experience than we had so far been presented with and included high class restaurants and friendly staff to his store.

The same is true today, I have been inside both dolled up to nines in designer items and wearing high street trousers and converse all stars and got exactly the same treatment, friendly and fabulous.  It's a similar story when it comes to parting with your cash.  If you spend hours browsing and purchase nothing (difficult but it has been done) opt for a splash the cash item or just a small box of macaroons there'll be no pretty woman style rebuttals for you.  Instead the staff are like polite friends stopping by for a quick chat, they just have access to more McQueen scarves than most of your mates.
Take one a good few times in your life (should you be so lucky)
3. Shoes
The Shoe Gallery is art for the foot fetishist.  There is nowhere else that has designer footwear, high street steals and all that is in between so artistically presented.  Plus they have a serious Louboutin section and a nice line in comical displays for us lot to ponder.

4. Grub
As mentioned above Mr Selfridge thought that food was an important aspect of the shopping experience and the choice for full on meals or quick bites are a cut above.  The restaurant in the Shoe Gallery is sublime but on the top floor is the cutest, least stressful food court I've ever experienced.  This includes pastas, salads and smoothies from Chop'd my latest favourite eatery, as well as a mini yo sushi selection, a deli and great looking cakes.
Chop'd Smoothies
5. The Location
Being in the heart of London, when you venture outside of Selfridges, Soho and Carnaby or Regent Street are all walking distances from my favourite place.  Its particularly lovely on a sunny summer afternoon to venture to Scoop on Brewer St, where they sell the nicest gelato outside of Italy.  Plus they have a lot of scoops on the wall.
quirky huh?

So there you have it.  Go investigate and find out for yourself.... Except if you do it'll be even more well known than already is, will become more crowded and next time I go I might not get in but for the hordes at the door.

Hmmm maybe you shouldn't go, yeah you'd probably hate it anyway, best to just ignore me. As you were.
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